WALDORF SALAD, OR FRUIT AND MAYONNAISE AND MARSHMALLOWS AND NUTS ALL MIXED TOGETHER FREAK ME OUT

Waldorf salad is another one of those things that can just be kind of tossed all together according to the taste buds of the cook. And if you’re a really sweet, kind cook, you will take into consideration your family’s/guests’ taste buds also.

But what if the item to be served is not a matter of taste so much as it is texture??

This very thing has happened in Mrs. Hate’s family—a texture issue brought to the forefront by none other than her son-in-law.

Waldorf salad showed up on the dinner table on a fairly regular basis when I was growing up. Here’re the ingredients:

  • apples (your preference of a tasty, crisp eating apple…back then apples were generally of the Red Delicious persuasion)
  • mayonnaise (used to use Kraft until they completely lost their cool AND their mojo when they changed the recipe several years ago..I HATED that little corporate decision (ridiculous), but rallied and discovered Duke’s mayonnaise…really quite good)
  • raisins
  • celery, diced
  • pecans, diced
  • marshmallows (why not use miniature)

And here’s how to put it all together!!

Peel or don’t peel your apples and cut in small chunks.

Add all other ingredients to your liking and proportion.

This must be the shortest Mrs. Hate recipe yet!!

But what about the rest of the recipe title…”fruit and mayonnaise and marshmallows and nuts all mixed together freak me out”?

Love that son-in-law, wouldn’t swap him for the world, he worships my daughter (she’s worship-worthy to the nth…a kumquat if there ever was one)…but his food quirks can be a challenge to the cook.

This is the type of son-in-law who throws his all into everything—intense, cheerful, thoughtful, curious, smart, talks a mile a minute, multitasks like Hydra in Greek mythology could have if cell phones and tablets and laptops and all such things had been around in myth time—but you put an innocent, harmless bowl of Waldorf salad in front of him and he says:

“WHAT IS THIS WITH ALL THIS FRUIT AND MAYONNAISE AND MARSHMALLOW AND NUTS IN IT? THINGS WITH FRUIT AND MAYONNAISE AND MARSHMALLOWS AND NUTS ALL MIXED TOGETHER FREAK ME OUT!!”

Well son, you are easily freaked out—a little high strung there it seems.

The poor thing kind of paled when we told him what it was and how much we loved it and could eat it by the bucketful.

Since he’s a big talker anyway, and my sisters and I were curious about just what was it about Waldorf salad that was so freakishly scary, we…asked him!!!

He started making his case for the fact that, individually, he LIKED all those ingredients and had no PROBLEM with them…individually.

But you mix them all together and the texture just…freaked him out.

We love him. He’s ours, all ours.

But Waldorf salad RULES, I don’t care who you are!!

 

HATE POINT:  the new Kraft mayonnaise
LOVE POINT:  that son-in-law